‘The bawdy, fertile, redheaded matriarch has kicked it’: A son’s hilarious obituary makes us laugh and cry at the same time
A loving and unusual tribute to Renay Mandel Corren, who died in El Paso, Texas at age 84
Some obituary notices open with the grand achievements of a life well-lived, or the tender details of a person’s passing with loved ones at their side. The death in El Paso, Texas, of Renay Mandel Corren, however, was marked in somewhat more unorthodox fashion. “The bawdy, fertile, redheaded matriarch of a sprawling Jewish-Mexican-Redneck American family has kicked it,” it read.
According to the
family’s obituary published
in the Fayetteville Observer, Corren, who died on Saturday at the age of
84, will be mourned “in the many glamorous locales she went bankrupt”.
They include her
birthplace of McKeesport, Pennsylvania, “where she first fell in love with ham,
and atheism”; Kill Devil Hills, North Carolina, “where Renay’s dreams, credit
rating and marriage are all buried”; and Miami, Florida, “where Renay’s
parents, uncles, aunts, and eternal hopes of all Miami Dolphins fans
everywhere, are all buried pretty deep”.
The remarkable – and
hilarious – 1,000-word obituary was written by Corren’s son Andy, and quickly
went viral after it was published on Wednesday.
The tribute to a
mother known fondly to her family as “Rosie” is a partly tongue-in-cheek
account of a long and eventful life, liberally sprinkled with anecdotes and
encounters, some of which Mr Corren admits might not even be true. But the
banter represents a loving tribute to a lady they still can’t quite believe has
actually died.
“Renay has been toying
with death for decades, but always beating it and running off in her silver
Chevy Nova,” the obituary states.
“Covid couldn’t kill
Renay. Neither could pneumonia twice, infections, blood clots, bad feet, breast
cancer twice, two mastectomies, two recessions, multiple bankruptcies, marriage
to a philandering Sergeant Major, divorce in the 70s, six kids, one cesarean, a
few abortions from the Quietly Famous Abortionist of Spring Lake, NC or an
affair with Larry King in the 60s.”
It also lists her many
talents: “She played cards like a shark, bowled and played cribbage like a pro,
and laughed with the boys until the wee hours, long after the last pin
dropped.”
“Renay didn’t cook,
she didn’t clean, and she was lousy with money, too. Here’s what Renay was
great at: dyeing her red roots, weekly manicures, dirty jokes, pier fishing,
rolling joints and buying dirty magazines.”
She lived her final
days “under the care, compassion, checking accounts and, evidently, unlimited
patience of her favorite son and daughter-in-law, Michael and Lourdes Corren,
of [the] world-famous cow sanctuary El Paso.”
Among the numerous
family members she leaves behind, including children, grandchildren and
great-grandchildren, is her “favorite son”, namely “the gay one who writes
catty obituaries in his spare time, Andy Corren, of – obviously – New York
City.”
The obituary concludes
with details of a planned funeral service in May next year, “a very
disrespectful and totally non-denominational memorial … most likely at a
bowling alley in Fayetteville.”
Meanwhile, Mr Corren
says he and his five siblings have given up on receiving an inheritance. “The
family requests absolutely zero privacy or propriety, none whatsoever, and in
fact encourages you to spend some government money today on a one-armed bandit,
at the blackjack table or on a cheap cruise to find our inheritance,” he
writes.
“For Larry King’s
sake: LAUGH. Bye, Mommy. We loved you to bits.”
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2021/dec/16/obituary-viral-renay-mandel-corren-texas
