Rachel Carrell - Some say children are in crisis. But this could be the generation that saves us
We’re having a “crisis
of childhood”, according to research from the charity Action for Children.
Doesn’t sound good – but it’s not a new phenomenon. It doesn’t seem like a day
goes by when we aren’t given yet another warning about the bloated horror of
modern childhood. Exams, bullying, gaming, social media, climate crisis, the
end of human employment, the Momo hoax …
everywhere you turn something is threatening our youngsters. But in many ways
there has never been a better time to be a child.
It’s not that social
deprivation doesn’t have a terrible effect on a young person’s ability to enjoy
their early years – it always has and it always will, and growing inequality is
among the greatest threats to children’s wellbeing. But as parents and
professionals improve their understanding of what it means to raise a child
well, the day-to-day things that once affected many children irrespective of
social status – such as being smacked, being seen and not heard, being told not
to cry or express negative emotions because they were babyish – are now thankfully
seen as cruel and outdated.
What’s more,
attachment theory – the idea that how we are loved by our caregivers as infants
will affect our ability to connect to others our whole life – is becoming part
of the mainstream parenting conversation. “They fuck you up, your mum and dad,”
wrote Philip Larkin in 1971. Well today, at least they’re trying not to. And in particular that
applies to the dads. The role of the father as merely “the provider” is over.
The number of stay-at-home
dads has increased 10-fold between
2000 and 2010. And even if it has dipped of late, a result of a lack of some
employers’ inflexibility, suggested
a recent study by Deloitte, all the evidence is that, where they can, dads
are doing their bit, with the same survey finding that about 64% of fathers
have asked for flexible working to fit in with their newborns... children who have more of their primary care needs
provided by fathers have stronger bonds with them as they grow older, that
they tend to
have fewer behavioural problems, according to a study by the University of
Oxford and also tend
to be smarter, according to research published in the Infant Mental Health
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